who am i really?
by emmi-bear2.0
Summary: a young girl gets harnessed and when it is removed she is disorientated. i suck at summaries just give it a go.


**hey guys this is my first fic on my new account so be kind :) i haven't had someone look it over so there could be a few spelling mistakes here and there. the story will take place just after the group leaves Charleston. as for my oc, i tried to make her have an attitude similar to rick except a little bit more opened minded. enjoy! :) **

Life since the invasion hasn't been easy. People die every day more so than before; people are more hostile than ever. I don't know when my story starts because now days most people have lost track of days and months. All I know is that it was well into the invasion when I was taken.

I was on a hunting and foraging trip with some of the camp members I was with at the time. The two tall guys flanking me had a couple of assorted guns each but for this run I only had my machete. My guns were in my pack for emergencies.

It was early morning, a good day for a supply run. We walked past a mirror and I barely recognised myself. Before the attack I had light brown hair and a pale white complexion, so you can only imagine what I look like now; my hair is longer as it is just below my waist, my skin is murky and dark with dust and soot. The only thing that hasn't changed it my eyes, they are still a deep but bright blue.

We find the abandoned warehouse we scouted the other day and leave a sentry as guard as me and one of the guys go inside. It doesn't take long to realise that it was a trap. We only have time to grab a few cans before we hear the tell-tale groaning of one of the alien's drones before it opens fire. I role out of the way but I can already tell my friend is dead. I get up to run from my hiding spot and immediately run into a crawler.

I step back and get my footing, not sure why it isn't attacking me. I have my machete out and ready when I hear a noise behind me, it was a buzzing sound. Then I black out. I was jabbed in the back and convulse as however many volts are pumped through my body.

I wake up to young screams at my ears. I look around and a dozen other kids my age are strapped face down on wooden slabs. I don't know what's happening and all I can think about is finding a way out of certain death, because that's what I am sure is happening. I didn't know then that this was just another way for the aliens to replenish their slaves and armies.

I tried to look behind me to see what was happening but I was useless. The fear ate away at me until I was rocking the table trying to move it away from the shoot that was positioned behind me. I heard a whoosh and went into a frenzy. The thing that I had been trying not to watch was going to happen to me. The table kept rocking and started to move until I heard multiple footsteps and it was stabilised. Something landed on my back and started to crawl over my legs.

"LET ME OUT! GET IT OFF ME!" I kept screaming but the only thing that changed was that the thing was getting closer to my back and the crawler holding the table started to stroke my head. It was not consoling in the least.

The bug thing finally reached my upper back and there was a split second before it poked something into me and I was screaming. I was incoherent but there was so much pain that I couldn't form words, I couldn't even think them, all I knew was that I was going to not be myself anymore, like I had seen so many of their slaves. Because I knew what was happening now, I was being harnessed. And that was worse in my opinion than death.

That was the last time that I was fully human. I remember nothing before that point and all I can remember is the pain of the transition and blacking out.

Months and months later…

When I wake up I get the feeling that a large amount of time has passed but I don't know why. I am used to the feeling of my brothers and sisters sleeping side by side with me, but all I get is cold metal. And my back feels lighter. Why does my back feel hollow? The next thing I feel is hunger and I can't figure out why I feel this pointless feeling. We don't get hungry, not ever.

I go to move my arms but something is attached to my left wrist, a needle? I rip it out without wincing. I sit up on the edge of my bed and feel cold, I look down and all I am wearing it a black loose shirt that was far too big for me and underwear.

I hear footsteps, but they don't sound right, there isn't enough of them, something is wrong. I realise what must have happened when a middle aged human woman walks up to me and smiles when she sees me awake and sitting.

"You're finally awake, that's good to see, my name is Anne. What's your name?" she gives me a minute to think and checks on my heart beat and other stuff like that. I don't know what to do so I let her.

"You do remember your name, don't you?" she is kind and I can see the sympathy in her eyes. I finally took a good look at her. She has auburn brown hair and brown eyes along with a moon face. She looked kind and I could see it in her face, she just wanted to help me.

"I – "I started to cough, I haven't used my voice in ages it felt like. So I cleared my throat. "I can't remember."

Staring down at my hands in my lap I felt lost. Who was I? Did this woman really care about me?

I was still lost in thought when some men and another younger woman in a white lab coat walked into the room.

I jumped up and profiled the people. Were they a threat? Yes. Was I defenceless? Yes. There were way too many of them so I stood down and tried to look like less threatening.

The man who spoke first was tall, greying blond hair and was wearing army gear with an old green cap.

"Hello, I've come to ask you a few questions about your time with the skitters. We found you working by yourself with minimal security."

"So it was you who took my harness off?" I couldn't help but ask I had to know. Why did they think that was ok?

"We all helped out, were just glad you're safe now." When the young doctor spoke I knew that she meant well but I couldn't help but start to be a bit freaked out. I looked from the window and the door, quietly evaluating a way to get out quickly. I was about to act on my thought when one of the men stepped forward, trying to console me. He had kind eyes with a slight hint of crows feet at the corner of his eyes. He also had short dark brown hair and a rugged brown beard. He walked like he was the leader of this group of people.

"It's ok, your safe now."  
"But I was safe before. I don't understand?!" I started to get frantic again but this time no one could calm me down. I didn't get far though before I was tackled to the ground and felt a small cold rush in my neck. I didn't see my assailant but that didn't make me any less knocked out.

The next time that I woke up I was in the same bed but this time I was tied down and still had some medication in my blood because I was sluggish and wasn't as strong as I usually am. Which as it turns out is pretty strong. I looked around and this time there was only one person. A teenage guy.

He looked about my age and he didn't notice I was awake because he was reading my paperwork on the clip board from the end of my bed.

He didn't look too threatening; he had green eyes, short dark blond hair with sides shaved shorter and he looked very slim. I was going to determine him as human when I caught the scent of something familiar, I think he is like me. He looked up at me and I noticed he has high cheek bones.

"You shouldn't have tried that earlier," he paused, having a good look at me. "What's your name?"

I wanted to be of help but I really didn't know. If he is like me than it must be safe here, so I gave it some thought but still came up with nothing.

"I'm sorry, but I don't remember."

He put down my file, "well it says here that the only thing out of place about you is the spikes. It looks like you were harnessed for nearly a year at least because they aren't receding."

"So I'm stuck like this? How long was I asleep?" I was feeling agitated again and had to change the subject.

"A couple of days. You shouldn't have woken up so soon anyway. We would untie you but we aren't sure of your state of mind." He seemed like he meant well, like all of the other people here.

"It's ok. If I were to be let out before, I could have hurt someone. Why is my harness off?"

"We had to take it off so that you could be out of their control."

"But they took care of me. What do I do now?" my last sentence came out as barely a whisper and I hadn't really said it to him.

"You can stay here with us, if you want. If you could remember where your family was…"

"Then I could try and find them. I just can't remember and it's killing me."

The rest of my day was a blur. I met a lot of people including the people who saw me earlier. I may be uncomfortable here but I was reassured it would get better by Ben, the boy who was by my bed. I apologised to professor mason who spoke to me earlier and who also happens to be the father of Ben as well as two other boys and a little girl. She didn't smell quite right but I thought it best not to mention it.

They were all very kind and before I knew it I was settling in. I still can't remember things but Anne says it's okay. She has been very kind to me. When she checked on me after I woke up the second time she explained things to me. She told me about the harness and how she could have removed it fully if she had the right equipment.

She explained to me how in the skitters care I would die of early age or become more like them. She told me that I could have gotten killed in the cross fire. But the most interesting thing that she told me was that their group of people were called the second Massachusetts and that helping anyone, especially people like me was something that they tried to do a lot.

**i still need to find a name for the girl because i will have a chapter on how she gets nick named. comment bellow what you think i should call her, just no last names only a first name. thanks guys!**


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